Toytota: The most reliable car you can buy!

Lately, the press has been a bit busy knocking Toyota down because of some technical problems. Apparently, there is some problems with accelerator cables, and some trouble with brakes. I am not very aware of exactly what it is, mainly, because i'm simply not interested.

I know a thing or two about Toyota. I used to work in a roadside assistance service for nearly a decade, and I can tell you how many Toyotas I did rescued: Two. One was a straight-of-the-dealer Corolla, that had its negative terminal slacken, and the other, a rust basket case from 1973 that decided to pack in the middle of Lisbon traffic. Fuel pump diaphragm punctured.

I remember once reading a book published by the Swiss automobile club (TCS) called "fiabilité" ( reliability), that said the most common problem in Toyotas was that you would get bored of them, before they have any chance of breaking down. And yes, you guessed: Toyota is the supplier of the entire fleet of road side assistance. And its driving school. I got some thousands of miles under my belt driving Toyotas, and they could beat any time of the day some of the "repmobiles" company cars people are used to dream about.

Lets think about this for a while: In one side, we have a company that every car it produces, is a huge and immediate sucess. Corolla. The most ever sold model in the world, even overtaking the Beetle and the Golf. Celica. Dyna. Avensis. Yaris.Hilux.Hiace. Supra. Land Cruiser. Which SUV do you see in documentaries around the world? Carrying TV crews , humanitarian workers or gun-totting rebels ? Hilux or Land Cruisers. Simply put, there isn't a single rubbish Toyota.

In the other side, we have recalls. All right...Recalls. Who ever never heard of them. I had my 1992 brand new Fiat Uno recalled because of a ignition module. Recall is normal in the industry, and some contingency plans are always in place. Not a single make of cars is exempt from recalls, and everybody is doing them. Some end up in quiet letters to the owners, some end up in the press. Having a recall in a model has ceased to be unusual, and became a simple procedure.

The difference is, recalls are being done increasingly inside a mad health and safety insurance ridden society. It will become worse: Time will come, when you will need to tow your car from a petrol station forecourt to the main dealer, because you can only tune Chris Moyles . Today ,Toyota is having some stick, tomorrow, someone else, for sure.

My point is, even if Toyota decided to build a couple of boards with an engine attached, it would still be one of the most reliable cars about, and I would buy one. If I, as a car enthusiast and consumer, am not able to trust Toyota,who will I trust? I just give up enjoying cars and buy a fishing rod instead. Because simply, Toyota is still the most reliable way of spending money in a car. As some ancient Toyota publicity used to say, " It came to stay". Indeed.

Good luck, Toyota. Todays papers are tomorrows fish wrap...

A VW meeting in Portugal

I thought you would like to have a peek into whats going on in a Portuguese VW meeting. And also, this is an excuse to remember the mates I left behind. "Is there any VW Scene in Portugal"- So you ask me often. Of course there is. Vws were once the real "peoples car", and most families had one . My dad had one. I did my exam in one, in the Air Force. A dual control one, with big lettering in the back bumper saying "Instrucção".( Driver under instruction).

I am in the VW scene since the early eighties, where beetles were pretty much the backbone of the poor people transportation. Cheap, reliable, easy to "have-a-go" mechanics, with parts easily found ( usually for free) in the countless wrecks left on the streets, the beetle was a free encyclopaedia of mechanics for a twelve-year old boy. I found very amusing being able to withdraw an engine from a beetle in ten minutes. Using just a pair of pliers and a 17 spanner!

The first meeting I attended, i mean, driving, was the VW Flash in Nazare, in 1989. A fishermen village north of Lisbon. Few cars, happy people, and beetle talking troughout the weekend,enough for you to slash your wrists or bore you to death. Nevermind. Unforgettable. As the scene caught on, opportunists "organisers" started to rip you off with extorsionary fees to attend meetings. You would take the car, you would pay, and the " organizers" would be congratulated! I kind of had enough of that and preferred the local meetings ever since. Or better still, spend the "admission fee" with my family, in a nice trip aboard the vw.

Campers are called in Portugal as " Pao de Forma", which means something like loafbread, given its shape carved like a "Hovis" bread. The Beetle, is known as " Carocha" which means exactly that, a beetle. At the meetings you are bound to find the same old "Technicians" and "Experts" that will gladly point at you that your number plate screws are from a 63 model and not, as you wrongly thought, from a 64 model. But there are also people that think VW are just a marvellous excuse to meet like minded people and to share experiences and tales of having a beetle.

There is an extensive "catalogue" of aircooled vw in Portugal, and it would be very difficult to find which beetle is "mainstream" or common. There are of course plenty post-68, but also plenty pre-68. Although, comparing with the UK, there is a shortage of "wedges", and the 4x4 Synchro are virtually inexistent.

Camper vans, just like mine, were some few years ago "gipsies vans" and "fishmonger vans". which would deem you socially unacceptable. No one would want to be seen in one, let alone have one! The Type 2 ( Camper vans) were just a cheap alternative as a goods vehicle and that was it. They started being admitted in the vw shows as something "funny" that by a strange coincidence, had the same engine as the beetle!

This is our "pub". A nineteen-forties retired boat converted as a Bar-Restaurant

As the years went by, they became scarse and suddenly, they became a sixties icon. Everybody wanted the "surf" or the "hippies" van. "Cute", as they say. There is nothing worse for a vehicle than being "cute". This is a meeting from "Clube Carocha do Seixal", the people with which I used to go and have some pints. These Photos were taken in August, just south of Lisbon. Mind you, this is just a local meeting, with local people. There are main events with hundreds of cars, ( extorsionary-organisers meetings) which i will post some photos . If I ever set foot in such place again...

Cars that nobody wants

A picture that worths a thousand words...or pounds.

Today, while I was reading the Daily Mail, I came across a rather awful picture, of a huge airfield completely clogged with unsold cars. Apparently, the credit crunch blow has been too much for the market,who can't shift enough cars. So they store them in an airfield in Oxfordshire.

There must be on that picture, THOUSANDS of cars, shown in an aerial photograph that pictures the entire runway, completely full of brand new vehicles. This must be something serious as it is one of the most intriguing automotive pictures I have ever seen in my life.

According to the article, the industry worldwide is facing a blant recession, and all the car makers are going through difficulties. Ford in the USA, has told that they are allright by now, but expect some troubles in the next few weeks. The senate, has already reject a bail out of the government to help the industry. But according to the the article, not every car maker is doing bad. Mini and Rolls Royce, are doing well, it says.

Apparently, car makers have lost some important time focusing on building gas guzzlers that no one wants. After a period of time that was "cool" to drive a pick up or an SUV, the running costs associated to a certain "bad image", targeted by the green activists and lobbies, made the idea of having a money pit lump parked in the drive, that vaccums all the money available for not much in return a very sad idea.

The average improvement of the car manufacturing process, took the reliability and durability of a car way beyond where it was ten years ago, where the cars started to rot as soon as they left the dealer. There isn´t much need of a new car now, as families keep hold of their still in good condition vehicles. This also helped to the recession.

The question of a bail out, as it happened in the banking, raises equally some questions: Are this companies going to produce some more society focused cars, or , as we see today, will persevere on making models for a niche, that no one wants, and expect the next time to get bailed out again? What will happen to these cars, built almost some months ago, lying around in an airfield, and getting older by the day? Scrap is the word that comes to mind.

Maybe it was a good ideia , if we start to produce cars that people need and seek for, and don´t just go producing because we must have a SUV in our range, because every maker has one...

Portugal: the "must see" place to find classics

This are photos taken last week , in Central Portugal, regarding some propriety that is completely CLOGGED with every classic car and bike needing a new home.

Remember some while ago that "barn find" in Portugal with hundreds of cars?( That wasn,t a "find " at all as it was simply the owner that opened his barn some years after...)

Forget about that. You cant touch any of that. On the contrary,most of these cars are for sale.

Imagine a place, where you can find Isettas in SHELVES, over a Mustang and a Facel Vega. And to get there, you have to TRIP over british bikes and Lambrettas left to rot in the walkway. I didn,t thought it was still possible to fins such place, in a country where minis and Renault 4s are outrageously overpriced. Let alone this.

Visiting this unbelievable place, is a permanent invitation to swear, and to disbelief. It belongs to an enthusiast that often visits England. There are no "normal" cars here. Only the valuable and the awkward. The ones that keep our dreams going.

Take a look at this. I wont bother you with no more talk...

The usually overlooked tractor

Your´s truly with the best of English...

I came from a country that only now is starting to pay attention to its agricultural heritage. A tractor, or any machine that has to do with agriculture, was always seen as a mere instrument used by farmers , which would be left to rot under the nearest oak once its engine or any other expensive part beyond financial chance of recovery would pack.

Immersed in a thirty years dictatorship , Portugal always struggled to modernise its agricultural machinery, leading the farmers to use their gear beyond its usual timeframe . I still use a Leyland 154 to do some work in my farm in Central Portugal. (Well, most towing city boys SUVs out of trouble..This ain´t no scholl run,mate!)

Abandoned at a construction site or a quarry? No way! It can be a very interesting machine to display!





And while first world countries would have acess to powerfull steam traction engines, as early as the beggining of the XX Century, we would still be using "Cart and ox" technology .So, it comes to me as a tremendous surprise to contact with machines in the UK for the fist time.
Why should we admire such machines? They only carry one person most of the times, drive flat out at 20 MPH, and it isn´t exactly an eye catcher among the social climbers. Most of them, don´t even have a number plate, for that matter!

Well, if one of your posh mates snear at you, just tell them this is a trike.


The thing is, these machines were so strongly built, that they could outstand the rigourous weather conditions, and still be around some decades later, itching to be attached to some device and prod happily in the mud. These machines, are very near to the concept of "being sculpted".


Most of the vehicles, try very hard to conceal the engine under some tin. Well, tractors are about the engine! Actually, I would think of a tractor, as an engine attached to some wheels. That´s it. And there is nothing more pure to a petrolhead than have a vehicle that it´s only about an engine.





An early steam engine at motion, in a 1916 Model. It doesn´t get better than this.

Going to the rallies, and watch those pristine engines brightly painted , doing their "tugtugtugtug", minding their own business, even if it is pouring down heavily, is something to respect and admire. These folks, came all the way from their home, to display these rather overlooked machines to the general public. For the kids to understand that potatoes do come from a farm and are dug by one of this machines. They don´t come from their local chippy, or Tesco.

I would like to think, that my collaboration , along with a fellow correspondent in Germany to a speciallized portuguese classic cars magazine, led to the creation of the first events in my country involving tractors. None had ever been took place before our chronicles depicting similar events in the UK. I hope the trend means that many more machinery will find it´s way out of the fields and under the oaks, to the showing grounds.

Tractor meetings? Well I started the trend in Portugal. Me and my mate Helder from Germany. Just in case the "clubs" start claiming that...

And for whoever thinks that tractors are a waste of time and space, check this out: People queue up for a quad bike, which also has four wheels and carry one passenger only. Why not buy a tractor instead? Turns up cheaper, has more torque and power, goes up steep hills,and I bet it doe more miles per gallon. And you can´t harvest some potatoes with a Banshee, can you?

Besides, Mr.Ferrucio Lamborghini and Herr Ferdinand Porsche, also had a go producing some mud prowlers along with their motors.

How about that?

The american classic car

I know, I know, that I can´t even dare to look at such outrageously huge machines in these days where petrol prices soar trough the roof, and the people from the petrol stations don´t even bother anymore to take the numbers they use on the sign back to the shop, because in a couple of hours later they must return to the entrance of the forecourt to swap the digits up.

But fortunately, there are some countries, like the USA, where you can actually fill a tank which only set you back a few bob. Or bucks, to be more in trend.

Lets just forget about the fact, that we need to apply for a loan everytime we dare to even leave the drive , and admire this tremendous seductive machines: There is nothing Freudian here with the size, it is just pure engineering used to shift a rather huge chunk of metal about, only for the single purpose of delight.

These cars, were made to celebrate the end of the war, and to show the world how glamourous the future could be. With petrol prices rivalling a can of Coke , there wasn´t exactly any worries about things like consuption. Or emissions. So, basically throwing a fishing boat engine into some 1o square meters of car, was a straightforward exercise , and the designers rooms were only busrsting with activity to see where they could put some more chrome and fintails than the competition. Which I can´t see anything wrong with that!

Then, there was no other engine to use besides V8´s. Anything that needed to move, had to have a V8. Motorbikes,boats,vans,cars,trucks,rigs,everything had to be powered by a compulsory V8. If they could chuck a Radial with 34 cilinders in every piece of machinery, i´m sure they would! ( Well, they used one in the Sherman tank, didn`t they?)

As a hideous marketing feature, they created the small block engine, which is the same that saying my Range Rover has a smaller 4200 cc. A small block, would weight more than a Fiat Panda altogheter, and a "big block" would of course need to be shifted by railway.

But these cars, are basically about statement: Never mind the three digit power numbers. You don´t own this sort of car to race or be fast. It was like trying to race an oil tanker against a sunseeker boat. No. You part with your money on a car like this, because of the Glamour and the grunt!

Few seconds after steping hard on that plate they call the accelerator pedal, you immediatly forget the 100 Pounds of petrol you just filled in. And you keep going and going , until there´s a choked sound of vacuum coming out of the hood, and the car grinds to a halt. Unless you have another full 20 litre can, you will never make it to the next petrol station.

Meanwhile, you storm passed a bunch of gobsmacked creatures left speechless in the bus stop, and you treated yourself with some notes from that exhaust under the tunnel. And that, my friend, has a price!

Everything in these cars, from the indicator arm to the lighter, is made of steel and it´s probably chromed. Opening the gargantuous hood, it´s like seating in a table starving and being served a full dish of our preferred grub. That had to come , at least from a lorry! That filter carrier the size of a bin lid, shows that the word "muscle car" exists for a reason.

Seating inside one of these thins, is an experience itself, and we wouldn´t even bother if the car had no engine at all. We could seat there for an entire afternoon reading a book or even sleeping alongside the front seat, without even touching the doors.

Fortunately, there are still coutries with 50p per litre written in the forecourts, where you can buy some transgenic manipulated lettuce and processed cheese sarnie, while listening to Willie Nelson. And give some good revvings to try stop listening to that dreadful Harley Davidson from that bearded bloke that just stopped next to me. I wish I had a Fats Domino tape instead.

BBC RADIO STOKE

O mentor do Sala das máquinas, nos estúdios da BBC com Lamont Howie

( Bilingual article / Artigo bilingue )

O site Sala das Máquinas, tem também a função acessória de demonstar o meu percurso pessoal em Inglaterra, além das habituais máquinas . Hoje, fui convidado pelo produtor Lamont Howie da BBC Radio Stoke, para falar sobre o meu mais recente livro, " How about England", que descreve na primeira pessoa a experiência de deixar Portugal e vir viver para o Reino Unido.

As the "Sala das Máquinas" website, has the acessory purpose of also log my personal achievements in the UK, i am pleased to talk about being invited by Lamont Howie, Producer from BBC Radio Stoke to speak about my experience of coming to this country and about my latest work, a book called " How about England."

Não há um dia sequer, em que os jornais não falem sobre imigração, como um "mal" desconhecido em que nacionais de outros paises apenas procuram o Reino Unido para adquirir subsídios e habitação camarária. E praticar crimes. Falar na palavra "imigrante" desencadeia uma imagem tenebrosa de indivíduos pouco sociais, ensimesmados em comunidades fechadas, sem se integrarem na sociedade, e em suma provocando um choque cultural e social.

There isn't a single day going by, without the media bringing the subject of immigration to the front pages. Immigration, is often seen as an "evil" thing, where nationals from other countries only seek the UK for benefits,crime and social housing, excluding themselves from the society, living in closed communities and therefore clashing socially and culturally.

Eu quis falar um pouco sobre isto, demonstrando a minha postura acerca de vir para Inglaterra como trabalhador especializado, que se integra na sociedade inglesa, e que apenas aceita uma diáspora no Reino Unido enquanto estiverem reunidas as condições de sustentabilidade financeira, e de aceitação pessoal e social. Não concebo permanecer num Pais, longe de tudo o que sempre conheci, e que constitui a minha identidade como português, vivendo miserávelmente e de subsídios. Para isso, ia para Portugal outra vez, onde ao menos podia comer umas sardinhas , e respirar profundamente o ar salgado na Serra da Arrábida sob um sol maravilhoso.

I wanted to speak about this, showing my views about coming to this country as a specialized Engineer, who did his effort to integrate in the english society, and who only accepts his staying n this country while he has means of sustaining himself economically, and being accepted both social and humanly. I can´t conceive being in this country on the dole, living out of benefits, withdrawn from my identity as a portuguese. If it ment to be like that, living miserably,I was better off being back in Portugal, where at least I could eat some nice sardines under a beautiful Sun.

A minha postura neste País, é a de trabalhar arduamente, tanto a nível técnico como pessoal, para conseguir uma integração plena na sociedade, e dar algo em troca a um Pais que tanto me deu. Nunca conseguiria agradecer o suficiente, por ter um dia tido a oportunidade de conhecer pessoas tão humanas,competentes, e desejosas de também tornarem o amanhã um pouco melhor.Para eles, para nós, e para todos. Stoke é uma cidade extraordinária, com uma herança cultural e industrial riquíssima, e eu acho que os seus habitantes deviam ter orgulho do seu passado e do seu contributo para o Mundo.

I will try to work as hard as I can, to achieve a full integration in this society , and give something back to a Country that reached out for my hand when I mostly needed. I couldn´t ever thank enough to such competent and human people I was fortunate to meet during these years, that believed in me and are at the same time as me, people that are trying to make of tomorrow a better day. Stoke is a magnificient city, and I think we all citizens of Stoke should be proud of the cultural and industrial heritage of this city, that gave so much to the world.

( Eyup duck? How at? I just came from up Hanley to the neck end, to me ice, to put me fate up, and have me snapping! Dust want to go Boslem or Tunster?See? I know arfur tow crate! )

Para ouvir a minha participação na BBC Radio Stoke, clique em

To check the BBC Radio Stoke Website,log on

http://www.bbc.co.uk/stoke/radiostoke/index.shtml

Driving in the "wrong" side of the road

Biggest I ever drove? Not a chance. I also had a go on a Olympian 11000 cc.

This topic comes with an extra amount of inspiration...I just did roundabout anti-clockwise before I got home!
I Drove for more than twenty years whitout a major accident. The odd smashed indicator, I must admit, but generally I thought I was a great deal of a Driver.What an illusion. Suddenly , when we start attacking the roads of England, we become worst than a daft braindead Sunday driver.Terrible!

The most laughable part, is that I keep reaching the nearside door of the car, as I was used to.Then I miss the steering wheel ! This of course generates giggles from everyone, and I have no other option but to go around the car , my head down covered in shame, and get the hell out of there as fast as I can.

When we first arrive in England, it is only natural that we dont have a car, unless we brought one from our country. Daft thing one should try to do I must say, given the appetite for destruction of the poor anti-social souls that improvise all sorts of wrongdoings just because they are bored. A foreigner car left unattended in an isollated area would provide them a white canvas upon they could express their frustration. And then there is the driving itself, where we would have to overtake stopped buses and lorries completely blind, and alight passengers directly to the middle of the road. No. For some reason, it doesn´t appeal to much.It wont do.

So, there is only one vehicle left , which is the most popular mean of transportation to a newcomer in Brittain: The pushbike. This is an excellent introdutory vehicle to whoever wants to start driving on the "wrong" side of the road. In case of starting our journey on the opposite side of the road, as we would do in our country, or entering a one way system by the wrong end, we have the opportunity to jump immediatly to the sidewalk whitout being runned down by a doubledecker or whitout destroying the corner shop in the process.

This is how I came up with a simple way of remembering which is the correct side to drive in each country: Cars, lorries and buses are designed to allow passengers to alight directly to the sidewalk. So, I created a simple sentence, which I keep in my mind all the time when i'm driving: " Give him the kerb" . So, if I keep the car on the side of the road that would allow my side passenger to enter or alight from the kerb, I would be allright. Of course, this is only valid if I'm driving a right hand driving car in Brittain.Or a Left hand drive one in the continent.

As the time went by, my legs and body were starting to take the toll of early morning freezing and raining journeys to work. So I decided that I certainly wanted to get my hands on any old banger that would be able to haul me from A to B. I managed to find a free Vauxhall Cavalier which was doomed for scrap, after had caught fire on the wiring loom and had the windows put trough so the yobs could nick the wireless. As an automotive engineer, I was able to troughouly repair it on my back street, and it provide me thousands and thousands of reliable motoring for my first couple of years.

There I went, reaching everytime for the nearside door, and if not, start performing all sorts of nonsense once at the wheel. I would relentelessly scratch my right fist on the door looking for the gear selector, opening the passenger power window, and indicating with the wipers. More than often, a very angry bald driver would make unkind gestures towards me and summoning me back to my homeland, just because I happened to be traveling dangerously on his direction. How inconsiderate of him!

Then, in one of the thousand different roundabouts you are bound to find, I struggled to interpretate all the different arrows in the pavement and make up my mind. How easy it is in the continent! Just go around , the closest possible to the kerb, and go out in the exit you want.How difficult can that be? Here, no way. You must go inside, and then, in the last minute pull to the outside of the roundabout to exit. So, I have all sorts of drivers honking at me furiously, and overtaking me. Good. Now I can follow them!

The spooky and menacing grinding noise that came from the gearbox, kept telling me that my left arm was still trying to come to terms of being used so often. Normally, I would only use it to open the door. Damn. Not even when I was twelve, and had a go with an old Renault 12 with my mates I remember driving so badly. What a complete useless thick driver!
The traffic lights, strangely change from red to yellow, before the so much waited green. Not as I was used to back in my end of the woods, where the green would appear like a lightining bolt, originatting a fierce fight to see which driver was the fastest. And loads of horning. So, when I first saw the yellow, there I was stopping, only to find that was actually changing to green, and everybody was storm passing me.

I would strongly encorage everybody that would want to drive in Brittain, to buy a copy of the Highway code. Its amaizing what you could still learn.
Just to end: I read somewhere that driving on the left side of the road was originally because of the carriage drivers using the whip with the right hand that would caught the pedestrians. Nowadays, there are dozens of countries that still drive like England, and practically every major car manufacturer provides Right Hand Drive models on their ranges.Nevertheless, in the continent we still drive in the "right" side...

Owning an SUV...How sad is that?

Today, I was testing for the first time the new SUV from Peugeot, the 4007.Looks like this lot had been around for some time and ended up using every three-digit number under the sun, so they resort to a four-digit trend. We had the awkward 1007, and now this 4007.

The usual qwirkyness of the design, like someone ,somewhere has to prove a point, like cars have to look sharp and agressive even if they are ment to do mere schoolruns, clogged with every possible gizmos and electronic stuff you can think of,shaped like it was under attack of any Stephen King,s novel psichopath, basically to please Dart Vader or The Adams Family.

Four by fours used to be about off-road. You would have one, because you would often go out to the wild, or to the nearest mud clogged throughfare you could find. Or even, if you would live in a country where nice tarmac roads would end as soon as you left the main cities.

But nowadays, for some reason, this cars seem to be associated with a far different customer. People from "the countryside", will buy instead nice Sallons and Station wagons with leather seats to forget about the cows and the tractors leaving blocks of mud behind . And you cant no longer do any off-road activities in the UK. Unless you seek for a quarry.

This leaves only a few customers interested in this type of vehicle. The school mum, that MUST have an SUV to protect herself while in a collision because of her lack of skills ( This car is very huge, you see?) , or because she was text messaging a friend and ended up parked over the railings, running the lollypop lady in the process.

Or the dodgy company director, that must project an image of strenght driving a dogs b******s of a car. Watching a X5 going by, is the XXI Century equivalent of Al Capone´s Chrislers and Fords. We shouldn´t mess with them.

And the Guy-that-wish-he-was-in-America! ( GtwhwiA) The GtwhwiA, drives his SUV or worst, his Pick Up truck in the middle of Telford, thinking he is in Santa Monica Boulevard surronded by palm trees. He has grown up watching those dodgy shows where some dumb low lives with square pattern shirts drive their Dodges and Fords about, with lots of chrome, getting p***ed in the local saloon and starting a fight whitout even dropping their cowboy hat. And listening all the time to cheesy country music.

So , the GtwhwiA, drives his Hilux or Mitsubishi, thinking that at any moment some ladies with a cowboy hat will come out of the "Red Lion" and cheer him up. In a road full of Gatsos , semi-detached and grey sky. For some reason, the GtwhwiA, shifts himself about in a two-ton lump , having trouble to park and to see other road users rather than him and his ego, moaning about the high insurance group, high tax, high tolls and high comsuption. Some would give the excuse of " need to tow a caravan" to justify their lack of good taste.

Modern SUVs are as fit to off-road use, as an ice cream van. I cant think of a single reason why should I endeavour through a desert road or area, with a computer on wheels. Worse still, why would I buy a Jacked-up Station wagon with large tires ? What do you think of the Audi Q7? Or the Qasqai? Oh, pleeease!

Buy a decent car instead. Your family your back and your bones will thank you imenssfully. And your image. And your wallet. If you dont live in a free country where you can use your SUV as you see fit,where you can wade into rivers and rev up hills just by the feel of it, or if you do not intend going in an expedition to Libia,buy a nice car. You think people would pay any more respect to you if you are aboard an SUV? Think again. And do some growing up in the process.

By the way: Dont bother with the 4007. Just buy a 307 SW and jack it up. It ends up the same...

My views on the Reliant Robin

Sadly, I woke up today to the news of the disappearance of Del Boy, from the "Only fools and horses" show. Altough back in Portugal we did have a massive broadcast of english shows, I could only had a go watching this show thanks to the courtesy of the "Mail on Sunday"free DVDs.

As we all are aware of, Del Boy used to drive the most famous Reliant of all, the yellow regal van. So famous,that it fetched recently an huge amount of money in an auction, around 44 grand!
A big departure from the average low prices paid for a normal "plastic pig".

"Plastic pig", is a rather sad and unfair designation for a vehicle that endeavoured the task of providing car transportation for the average motorbike license holder. A fair and honest attempt to motorise the average citizen , that could not afford a proper car. We should respect it for that.

Although the show did put Reliant on the enthusiast map, it started a trend on painting every single Robin yellow, with the " New York,Paris, Whatever" written on its pannels. That eventually worn the overall image of the model, and contributed towards the lack of respect and interest on the little three wheeler. Mr Bean, did some harm, by refusing to have a lift kindly offered by a passer-by.

I find very amusing driving a Reliant Robin. The first time I drove one, was during a test drive for a Portuguese magazine . The sheer confined space , and the roaring vibrating the dash, the feeling of driving a soap in a bathtub, the creeking fiberglass and the " British Leyland feeling" throughout the car, made this the ideal counterpart of the french 2 CV,as far as amusement while driving concerns. The "mini" noise, pushing that wheel towards any direction except the one chosen, and the three point turn turned "eight point turn", made the exercise of driving one a very awkward and unforgettable experience.

My reflex on the shop windows, as I paciently stroll arround the busy one way system, would resemble as if I was aboard a wingless Cessna. I tried to look the more british possible, but somehow the grin in my face was a telltale that I was a first timer. Nevertheless, I felt privileged for having the possibility to drive such...er...device.

The last models of the Robin, Rialto facelifts, were a dreadful image of an agonising english industry. The falling demand for a car still built by hand labour, and the "keeping up for the jones`" trend, send the Reliant to the great heaven of cars no longer manufactured.

I would like to think that , slowly, the Reliant will be rescued from a doomed condition of an old disposable car, and finnaly would take his place among the fellow automotive counterparts that had an important role in the History, making it possible to simple people to dare dream with a car.

Our mood and hopes would be largely improved by that.

The awkward classic car scene in some countries

We all smile and are often flooded with fond memories, each time a classic car ( Please do not use the term "old", as it is rather unfair for some excelent cars about, not so "old" that are really nice classics)strolls nicely in front of our sore eyes. Suddenly, a car is not just a line produced item, stripped of any feeling whatsoever, and becomes a long lost pal that longs to be with you again.

Classic cars used to be about fun. About meeting. About making friends. They Still are, in some countries where they have their roots deeply stuck in the ground. Like England. England had a massive industry , gave birth to the Industrial Revolution, and kept going on and on triying to give to the average citizen a slice of motoring which they could sink their teeth on.The british people grew up with some of the finests cars on their drives, even naming them with human-like names. Brittain was always used to an MG or an Austin, as they were with washing machines.

But everywhere else, especially where car industry was very poor or inexistent,cars were rather expensive to start with. Even washing machines, let alone cars! A car was something designed for rich people and seen as an outrageous sort of luxury. When I was at primary school, there was only a Mini doing doing the school run every lunchtime...and the bloke was the talk of the school!

This ment that cars in these counties were driven to the ground before someone ever thought of buying a new car. This could mean several years beyond the timeframe of service a car would normally do. Suddenly, with a friendly political and economical situation , these countries could finally update their roadstock very easily. So, all the cars that had done a remarkable job and managed to survive the potholes, were made redundant. Cars that were already clased as "old" in other developed countries, were still being used as commuters in those days.

As you can see, there were no shortage of wannabe classics when the scene started. Nearly every family could grab hold of a Mini, a Beetle, an Escort, or a 2CV. The first classic cars meetings I attended, back in the early eighties, were FREE, and we had remarkable weekends by the beach or by the mountains, scoffing barbecued pork, and drowning in beer. And dancing, and laughing. And making friends. Normal people could enjoy the classic scene.

But the happiness had to be short. The growth of the classic scene, ment that the average rustbucket left to rot on the drive could fetch some awful lot of money. The seller would look suspiciously to any offer" because those cars were very valuable", and the buyer often gave up upon such outrageous atempt of getting easy money.

As a result, lots of cars went beyond repair, and eventually were towed by the council to the great heaven of the classics. Then, as a final stroke, came along the "adds fever". The "adds fever", ment that if a greedy owner wanted for some reason to flog his Mini for,lets say, three grand ,1000 "contos"( Yes! In Portugal there are some people trying to sell a Mini for three grand...and worst, there are people actually BUYING them!...)then EVERY rustbucket filler patched was worth three grand!

As these cars were often propriety of poor families, they often see these opportunities as a way of "getting rich"...not accepting any offer whatsoever under those ridiculous amounts of money.

How come a car that worths pennies in a country, fetch sky rocket prices in another? This sad sittuation, is dreadfully dragging the enthusiast to the only thing he can actually buy....Bycicles!
How sad is that? I wanted to have a nice classic car which I could maintain and enjoy, and the only thing I can dream to afford is a dreadful push bike!

And you know what? As everybody that cannot afford to have a "car", and is turning into Bycicles, greedy sellers are piling on the price of ancient pushbikes...You can have a MG Midget , an A30, or a Minor for the price they would ask you for a bike in those countries right now...